By the nine, what is this damn sorcery?

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By the nine, what is this damn sorcery?

Post by Valdimir on Wed Apr 25, 2012 3:21 am

Oi, why hallo there ladies and gentlemen pretending to be ladies. So I'm in a...bit of a predicament I should say. So I just woke up in my caravan right outside of Riverwood, and that's it. All I remember is having that nice drink and a venison with a client in whiterun, which was apparently two weeks ago. My pants aren't gone and I haven't been married to a giant, so I'm guessing that a daedra prank is out of the question. However, none of my merchandise or belongings have been stolen. Though when I woke up my arse was covered with these damned feathers.

This may seem like shooting an arrow in the dark, though perhaps any of you might have some information of the mishaps I may or may not have partook in these past several days? I'm sure that word of mouth would travel rather quickly by now.

...also please don't tell me that I'm engaged. That probably won't end well for either party.
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Re: By the nine, what is this damn sorcery?

Post by Regulus Vortens on Wed Apr 25, 2012 4:34 am

I shudder to think of how someone could have 'feathered your arse' without removing your trousers.
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Re: By the nine, what is this damn sorcery?

Post by Samylin on Wed Apr 25, 2012 9:01 am

Clearly your subpar merchandise wasn't worth the effort of taking.
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Re: By the nine, what is this damn sorcery?

Post by Valdimir on Wed Apr 25, 2012 12:15 pm

Samylin wrote:Clearly your subpar merchandise wasn't worth the effort of taking.
Oi! Don't be so damned smug. Even if that were true the thief could have made quite the profit with the amount of merchandise I carry with me.

Obviously, the little shit/s were more interested with me rather than my caravan.
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Re: By the nine, what is this damn sorcery?

Post by Nightshade on Wed Apr 25, 2012 9:19 pm

Possibility one: You murdered several chickens for their feathers then stuffed them down your trousers because your arse felt cold.
Possibility two: Someone very skilled in stealth stuffed them in just to confuse you.
Possibility three: You did it yourself as a drunken dare. Maybe you should retrace your steps from the last place you remember.
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