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TESRP

The Elder Scrolls RP


Klinu, faru min, bagatahkso manauw kaj merauw!

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Amelin
Seeks-Many-Secrets
Asren Free-Spirit
Krahkt
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TESRP :: In Character :: Apocrypha

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Klinu, faru min, bagatahkso manauw kaj merauw! Empty Klinu, faru min, bagatahkso manauw kaj merauw!

Post by Krahkt Sat Jul 28, 2012 11:40 pm

Mi ahkstas so potahknca Krahkt so Corpulahknt! Rigardadi sur mia bahklahkga vizago! Mi lahkvigxis dahk lokauw kaŝita por rahkgi so tuta mondo ahkn so nomo dahk so glora Mannimarco, plahkj granda ahkl ciuj mortosorcxistojn! Via timo ahkstos Mia subtahknas kaj viaj ostauw mia pasoco!
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Post by Asren Free-Spirit Sun Jul 29, 2012 12:04 pm

Beg pardon?
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Post by Krahkt Sun Jul 29, 2012 12:38 pm

Cu mi dahkvas malpura tiuj pagauw kun via malbahkso lingvo por komuniki? Bahklaj.

Bow to your better.


Last edited by Krahkt on Sun Jul 29, 2012 12:53 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Post by Asren Free-Spirit Sun Jul 29, 2012 12:41 pm

Forgive me, but I can't exactly bow to someone who's not physically in front of me.
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Post by Krahkt Sun Jul 29, 2012 12:53 pm

Your body is intrascahkndentahk. Your soul is what I desire.
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Post by Asren Free-Spirit Sun Jul 29, 2012 12:59 pm

Can't have it, arse-licker. It's mine, and I'm using it. If you're such a big and scary soul-eater, come and claim it if you have the balls!
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Post by Krahkt Sun Jul 29, 2012 1:05 pm

Have you any idea to whom you speak? I am Kahkt the Corpulant! Soon my shadow shall be cast over all of Tamriel and all shall know that Sload are the superior being!
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Post by Asren Free-Spirit Sun Jul 29, 2012 1:14 pm

Uh huh, uh huh, you sound like a drunken Altmer on a glory rant. I had no idea Alto wine could even get you that blitzed, the bloody lightweight swill.
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Post by Krahkt Sun Jul 29, 2012 1:21 pm

Alkoholo clouds the mind and impairs judgement. A true leader does not partake. The only narkotajauw I need is power!
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Post by Seeks-Many-Secrets Sun Jul 29, 2012 1:25 pm

...what in Oblivion is this?
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Post by Amelin Sun Jul 29, 2012 1:43 pm

I didn't know Argonians could be that fat.

Yes, I know...whoever this is isn't Argonian, does anyone else know better?
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Post by Krahkt Sun Jul 29, 2012 2:23 pm

Lacacktohomauw!? How dare you insult Krahkt the Corpulent!? Your malrahkspahkto shall be punished under my new order!
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Post by Kennek-Getha of Iblan Sun Jul 29, 2012 2:32 pm

TALOS ABOVE YOU'RE FAT.

It's like your fat became sentient and started fucking, making more fat! Your eyelids have fat! Your jowls have chins, and your chins have jowls!

I can only imagine what you smell like!
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Post by Krahkt Sun Jul 29, 2012 2:39 pm

I see you are admiring the mighty visage of the Sload.
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Post by Kennek-Getha of Iblan Sun Jul 29, 2012 2:50 pm

I'm pretty sure if I hit you with a hammer, it'd just bounce off you. Children could use you for recreation just by jumping up and down on you.

Ugh. I don't even wanna imagine how you manage to avoid just... suffocating from all that fat.

No one's ass should be that big, not even Big Ass Lynda! AND SHE HAD A BIG FUCKING ASS! Thus, the name.

I could write a poem based on how fat you are. It'd be called Lard: The Ballad.
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Post by Krahkt Sun Jul 29, 2012 3:00 pm

I could crush you under my tail, malforta Lacacktohom.
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Post by Amelin Sun Jul 29, 2012 3:01 pm

That depends, are you capable of walking?
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Post by Kennek-Getha of Iblan Sun Jul 29, 2012 3:02 pm

Could you even fucking lift it?! I'm surprised you can lift you!

I'm a bard by trade, and I'm running out of words to describe how fat you are! It's like one day, the gods decided to have a contest to see who could make the most unappealing race, and right now it's tied with Altmer and whatever the hell you are!

YOUR CHIN LOOKS LIKE A SCROTUM! HOW DO YOU EXIST?!
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Post by Krahkt Sun Jul 29, 2012 3:12 pm

Walking is for the dim-witted and simple-minded.
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Post by Amator Bellum Mon Jul 30, 2012 10:22 pm

WONDEROUS THAT A FAT SLUG SUCH AS YOURSELF CAN WRITE

WATCH OUT FOR SALT

I'VE SEEN YOUR KIND BEFORE, BEAST. YOU DISGUST ME. YOUR ARROGANCE IS REVILING. I'D FIGHT YOU IMMEDIATELY WERE YOU BRAVE ENOUGH TO FACE ME, VERNUS REX, EMPEROR'S SERVANT.
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Post by Asren Free-Spirit Mon Jul 30, 2012 10:30 pm

The fact that you know what sloads are surprises me far more than the fact that hatred is a concept that exists to you and your hilariously tiny brain. Judging by your scrawls that some would dare to call 'writing', I'd thought you just punched everyone in sight equally. I taught myself to write and yet I'm probably better at it than you ever could manage. Hells, I've probably got more restraint than an idiot like you, Imperial mongrel.
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Post by Amator Bellum Mon Jul 30, 2012 10:33 pm

I'LL KILL YOU BEFORE YOU SPEAK ANOTHER WORD TO AN HONORED CELEBRITY LIKE ME

I WILL BE FORCED TO WIPE YOU FROM MY BOOT UPON THE CORPSES OF YOUR THUGGISH FRIENDS

YOU HAVE MADE A POWERFUL ENEMY TODAY.
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Post by Asren Free-Spirit Mon Jul 30, 2012 10:55 pm

Bring it. I like an interesting opponent, even one so daft as yourself. You claim to fight for honour? Feh, honour's a childish concept dreamed up to pretty up the rape, pillaging, and slaughter war usually brings. There's no glory or honour in fighting, it only brings suffering to all around it.

Actually, I don't thing you even know what the meaning of the word 'suffer' is. You're nothing but a foppish, inbred, (possibly, correct me if I'm wrong on that) and borderline CHILDLIKE fool that not even the Thalmor would consider a worthy pawn, pampered and paraded about like a thing to be admired. HAH! I SPIT on your name, Vernus Rex, and if you think you can back up any claim you've said in these bloody, godsforsaken tomes, then feel free to track me down. Just know one thing, I'm not some idiot drugged up and given to you as a sacrificial lamb. You may be big, but I've fought and slain much bigger than you.

Talos show mercy on your next 'opponent', mongrel.

*what looks like a bunch of spit can be seen on the bottom of this page, either that or it's ink intended to look like spit*
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Post by Krahkt Mon Jul 30, 2012 11:09 pm

I do not do battle against those that are beneath me. Vi nahk mahkritas mian atahknton.
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Post by Lupin'Vola Tue Jul 31, 2012 1:11 am

But...if they were beneath you they would be crushed, wouldn't they? Also, could you reach something beneath you?

I'msorrynevermindstupidquestion.
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